When it comes to sex in the workplace, especially between an employee and a member of management, people always seem to think they know which party is at fault. Either there is a young overly-flirtatious, gold-digging floozy trying to cause trouble and somehow get money or there is a power-abusing, pervert using his position to get in the pants of all the innocent young teenagers who are coming into the workplace for the first time.
ABC News tells the story of a 16 year old girl, a barista at Starbucks, who claims that her 24 year old manager was going to use personal information against her if she didn't have sex with him and that other managers knew about and did nothing to stop the sexual relationship. When the girl's mother found a pregnancy test, she began questioning her daughter who told her about what was going on at work. Now the 16 year old is suing Starbucks. In their defense, Starbucks has made it public knowledge that this girl had not only had sex before, but a lot of it! They claim she's had "sexual encounters" with 12 other men.
Hopefully the courts got this one right. If the girl was victimized and honestly felt like she HAD to have sex with this man for whatever reason, then he deserves what he got. What bothers me about this is what I read in most of the comments. Everyone seems to know who to blame just by skimming through a few paragraphs on their lunch break. I've got more questions. I want to see the text messages. And what exactly did the boss know?
Now if I had to guess, I would say this girl probably enjoyed getting attention from an older man, at least at first. The biggest question I have is when did she stop enjoying the attention? Was it when the relationship became sexual? When her mom found the pregnancy test? When Starbucks disclosed how many sexual partners she's allegedly had? Or is she still enjoying the attention she's getting? Whatever the case, the people commenting are very eager to talk about how horrible Starbucks is and not at all willing to ask more questions or do more research before they decide who to blame.
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Jessica,
ReplyDeleteWhat an interesting story and blog! I have always found our sexual psychology very fascinating.
I cannot presume to know who is at guilt here, but what I can say is that Starbucks is promoting a double-standard. In our society, a man can have his list of sexual “conquests” and that is acceptable. However, if a woman gives in to the same urge and displays the same behavior, she is then called a “fill in the blank”. I do not agree with this way of thinking. Seriously, if the employee in question ( the barista ) was a male, do you really think that his sexual history would have even been brought up? Hell to the “no.”
You brought up some really good questions, such as “When did she stop enjoying the attention?” (If at all.) At the end of the day, we all like our share of attention. If this is the way she likes to get her attention, then so be it, it’s her choice. But if this girl was in any way pressured to have sex, then Starbucks is morally and legally liable. If they are using the defense of the girls’ sexual history, then that is pathetic. They are blame-shifting. The issue is not the girl’s sexual past, but the behavior of their manager.
I agree with this blog. It seems that the policies on Sexual Harrassment have made it to where so many things can be considered "harrassment". However, as we all know that it is unfortunate when it does occur. Yes there are the preconceived individuals who solicit other individuals but sometimes I think it can be the "sleepers" too.
ReplyDeleteIn a case such as this one it would be hard to know if she did decide that the advances were not wanted. But the age of the manager himself should have kept anything from happening in the first place. That alone is wrong. Be it that he was her manager and his age.
The whole event may have started out innocently enough and eventually the situation changed. Or maybe it was unwanted contact. The truth may never come out either way.
Hopefully the company will take steps to try to ensure this does not happen again. As for the girl - hopefully this experience will create a new positive path for her.